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Venus In Libra – Focus On Relationships

Venus, the Goddess of beauty and love, enters Libra, the sign of relationships on August 6th.

This is a happy placement for Venus because Venus rules Libra. If Venus is about ‘give and take’ and the way we relate to others, Libra is all about 1-on-1 relationships. A relationship involves two people, ‘me’ and ‘the other’.

If from Aries to Virgo we learn about ‘me’, with Libra we delve into uncharted territory. Truly knowing ‘the other’ is an art and science very few of us master, but an art and science Venus in Libra is great at.

Knowing ‘The Other’

You know you know the other when you become aware you are not alone in this word. If the opposite sign, Aries, is about the affirmation of the individual, in Libra you learn that you can only go that far if you follow your needs and wants only.

Becoming aware of the other can be one of the greatest psychological breakthroughs in one’s life. If we skip this step when it takes place naturally (between the age of 13-15), we tend to have problems in relationships later on.

Becoming aware of ‘the other’ means much more than simply acknowledging someone. It goes far beyond that. It is a deep understanding that we are different. One of my teachers beautifully put it: “If you really know someone, you cannot hate them. You can only love them”.

The problem is most of the time we think we know someone. Let’s say we notice they like scrambled eggs while we like an omelet. This is a good start, but truly becoming aware of ‘the other’ is much more than that. That deep knowing, that deep understanding is a mind-blowing experience when it happens, and it shifts your perspective about life forever.

You know you know someone not when you feel sorry for them (the psychological mechanism behind ‘feeling sorry’ for someone is self-identification, you are in fact feeling sorry for yourself).

You know someone when you’re able to distance yourself from them and become a witness. Becoming a witness, an observer, a third party, is a state of complete acceptance without personal bias to alter the event, find fault, or judge. A good way to think about a witness is really to envision a third party, a third person if you like, that is not you, nor your partner.

That is ironic because relationships are about two people, right?

A successful relationship involves two people, but also a third entity that can see things for what they truly are.

Libra And Open Enemies

Interestingly enough, Libra also rules our ‘known’ or ‘open’ enemies. In contrast, Pisces, the last zodiac sign, rules the ‘hidden enemies’.

This is an important distinction. Who are your known enemies? People you agree to disagree with. With open enemies you always know where you stand.

Everyone has ‘enemies’. If you are in business, these are your market competitors. Open enemies are crystal clear about their intentions, and they won’t harm you if you play by the rules. Policemen are also open enemies. They become enemies only if you break the rules.

In fact, you can gain power by knowing your enemies. Benchmarking against a competitor can push your own business further, because it shows what your weak points are.

Libra, The Scales And Reason

Libra is the sign of the scales. Libras are being misjudged for being all about fairness and compromise. It’s much more than fairness and compromise about Libras. A scale simply shows how one side of the scale relates to the other. Is it heavier, or lighter?

Venus in Libra Relationships
Heidi Younger

A scale is a measure of objectivity. Libra is, beyond all, the sign of justice and judgment. It shows you where you’re at – really. We all think we are right, we are so convinced we are right, that we do stupid things in the name of what is right from our perspective. But what is right for us may not be right for others. That’s why you need an objective measure of what’s right. That’s what Libra is about.

Libra is the only sign of the zodiac that is not a human or an animal – it’s the only inanimate object of the zodiac. Libra is the sign of reason.

To be good at relationships, you need to have reason. After the Leo romance and the Virgo adjustment, for a relationship to succeed, you need to be able to be rational about it. This is the secret of successful relationships. Only after, the relationship can reach intimacy and depth in the sign of Scorpio.

Libra is about a deep understanding of the other, with their differences, with what makes them special. Libra is a triumph of differences, of what makes us unique. If Aries is ‘take me as I am’, Libra is “I take you as you are because I understand you are unique and because I am able to see you for who you are. Because I see your true colors.”

Venus In Libra

Venus is a feminine planet – in relationships, it shows the feminine dynamics. If Mars is the pursuer, Venus is the one who chooses the right match.

Libra is a cardinal sign. Cardinal sings love to take the initiative, start new things and be in charge. In courtship, it’s Venus the one that chooses and invites, it’s Venus who sends the courtship signals.

Venus in Libra is the iron hand in velvet glove. She knows what she wants, and she goes and gets it! Venus is choosey in Libra, and makes the best relationship decisions.

Libra rules all our 1-on-1 relationships, while Venus is about what we like and dislike.

Venus in Libra shows what we like and what we dislike in relationships.

Sometimes you just ‘like’ someone, as simple as that. You don’t have to like everyone, because not everyone is your match, and it shouldn’t be. Liking the right people and being liked in return is waaay more important than having everyone liking you a little bit.

But to figure out who you like and who you don’t, you need some interaction. You need to have an exchange, a relationship with that person. Liking someone’s photo on Instagram doesn’t necessarily mean you have a relationship with that person. A relationship starts with being open and honest about who you are.

A relationship starts with showing up.

Venus, Libra and Relationships

Both Venus and Libra are concerned with relationships that’s why Venus and Libra are a great astrological match. Venus is in domicile in Libra, and this means that anytime Venus is in Libra we will all get better at what Venus and Libra are good at: relationships.

Being good at relationships means you find the right ‘balance’ (yes, the scales) between what you want and what the other wants. This doesn’t mean equality, and not ever fairness by the standard definition. Life is not ‘fair’. Life is ‘right’. You get what you need, when you need it, even if you think it’s not fair. Life is divine justice.

Sometimes, your needs are more important. Other times, your partner needs are more important. Knowing what, when and how are Venus in Libra’s specialties.

Having good relationships doesn’t mean you have to always compromise. In fact, this is a recipe for disaster. Your partner wants to grow with you. They want to know when they’ve gone too far. They want your feedback, even if that means pointing to what they’ve done wrong.

But ruthless criticism is also a recipe for disaster. And here comes the magic of Venus in Libra.

Venus in Libra knows how to give feedback without sounding like criticism.

I know, from all qualities in the world, this one doesn’t sound particularly sexy. But it is probably the most useful one.

Knowing how to give feedback in the right way is that one skill that can basically guarantee success. Master this and you will master relationships: with your romantic partner, with your colleagues, with your family members, with pretty much everyone.

Venus in Libra is about understanding the other so you can reach a win-win outcome.

The secret of successful relationships is having both parties win. Everything else is either short-term, or it will be taken away from you sooner or later.

Venus In Libra Transit

The upcoming Venus in Libra transit is a great opportunity to improve your relationship skills.

Notice how you react to others, or how others react to you. What is different? What does it work, and what doesn’t?

Venus will leave Libra on September 10th, will turn retrograde on October 4th (in Scorpio), and re-enter Libra on November 1st. Venus will finally leave Libra on December 3rd, this time rising as a morning star.

During its long stay in Libra, Venus will change from an evening star (rising in the evening, after the Sun sets) into a morning star (rising in the morning, before Sun rises).

Venus in Libra is your greatest opportunity to transform the way you do relationships for the better.

The first phase of Venus in Libra is when Venus is in Libra and is an evening star (August 6th – September 10th 2018). This is the best time to examine your current relationship patterns.

The 2nd phase of Venus in Libra is when Venus is in Libra and retrograde (November 1st-November 15th 2018). This is the time to make the necessary relationship adjustments.

The 3rd phase of Venus in Libra is when Venus is in Libra and is a morning star (November 15th  December 3rd 2018). Now is the time for new beginnings in relationships. By now, you know what you want, and you know how to understand and relate to the ‘other’.

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Equinox 2017 – Half Way Through

On September 22nd is the Equinox day – the  Autumn Equinox in the Northern Hemisphere and Spring Equinox in the Southern Hemisphere.

Equinox literally means “equal night”.

No matter where you live on earth, today the day is equal to the night. The Sun and the Moon share the sky as equals.

The nature achieves the perfect equilibrium between light and darkness, male and female, yin and yang.

With the Equinox, Libra season starts. The symbol of Libra is the scales. The scales of Justice has been, and it’s still used as a symbol of the democratic legal system. The scales are associated with judgement, balance, and the Truth.

The Equinox is about finding balance – inside and out. Now is the best time to ponder in which area of your life you need to have more balance.

Balance is a somewhat abstract concept. We always aim to achieve balance, just to get out of balance in the very next moment.

The Equinox is similar to the concept of “zero” on the number line. Zero is a balanced number which has equal amount of positives and negatives. On the other hand, infinity is the point of extreme chaos.

At the Autumn Equinox, the Sun is on the zero line, setting on the other side of the horizon. From there, the Sun has a panoramic view.

Autumn Equinox Astro Butterfly

Right in the middle, having passed half of the zodiac, and having ahead in sight the other half, the Sun is in a position to judge in an unbiased way. He can see both perspectives.

Imagine you enter a restaurant and pick the last table in the corner. You can see everyone, yet not everyone can see you.

At the Autumn Equinox, the Sun has already been though half of the zodiac. From there, the Sun can see what he left behind, but he can also look forward, toward the path in sight.

When it sets, the Sun has both perspectives. Just like the Sun, now is the time to ponder on what you have done in the first half of the year (from March 21st until now) and adjust your plans for the 2nd half of the astrological year (from September 22nd 2017 until March 21st 2018).

The goals and intentions you planted during that time of the Spring Equinox will now reach their fruition. If you’ve been trying hard and doing your best, your efforts are very likely to pay off now.

The Equinox is a significant time for relationships. Now is the best time to get clear about what you want out of life and out of your relationships, and then make the necessary adjustments.

Libra is the sign of relationships, and that’s because a relationship represents that point of balance, where both partners give and take equal amounts of value. Any relationship that is not build on fairness, balance, equality, is not a real relationship.

It is nothing wrong with going for romance, having an affair, but when we mean relationships we mean two partners coming together, cooperating, and adjusting to each other’s needs.

When one partner starts giving more than the other, the relationships usually breaks.

Right now, you know better who you are and what you want. If at the beginning of a romantic relationship we tend to give everything, to be overly generous, to hide some parts of ourselves, the Equinox is that point in our development when we get honest about who we are and what we want.

Now it’s time to get things straight – this is what you have to offer and this is what you expect in return.

That’s why Libra is the sign of negotiations. “I’ll give you this, if you give me that – so we can both win”.

If some people in your life got used to take advantage of you, now is time to take action and claim what you deserve.

On the other hand, if you have not been giving your best and tried to understand the other, the Equinox is the point where you need to bring things to balance. If you are prone to jump to conclusions, now you may want to slow down and give people more chances.

If your partner is upset that they are always cooking dinner and you never do it, now is the time for you to start cooking the dinner, and “do your part”.

It is very important to strike a balance right now and adjust to what you have learned – you don’t want to live the 2nd half of the year in remorse.

The Equinox take place at the 0° of the cardinal sign of Libra. The cardinal 0° is VERY powerful and is associated with action and new beginnings – we only have 0° Cardinal in the first day of Aries, Cancer, Libra and Capricorn.

September 22nd is one of the 4 times in a year when is best to take action. If in the spring, action is about starting something new, now in the autumn, action is about setting things straight.

Half of the year is already over. Now you have the chance to ponder over what you’ve done – and reap what you’ve sown. And later in the dark winter months, you can finally take the time to reflect on what is really important for you and prepare yourself for the next Spring.

The Autumn Equinox is a time to embrace the paradox of duality. The truth has many facets and your truth might not be the other person’s truth.

The Autumn Equinox is also the best time to make objective judgements.

Right now you may feel that “you can’t hide any longer” the truth of who you are. Face what you have to face and let it go so that you can move on. Make that decision. This decision will shape the 2nd half of the year and next chapter of your life.

In the process of letting go to make space for the new, some regrets may arise. Wounds from the past that you never had the chance to heal, things you cannot forget and forgive, remorse, bad habits you don’t have the courage to break – they will all come back to you now.

We have a natural tendency to focus on what could have been, what might have been, what should have been, the truth is, we have absolutely no idea what the outcome of that would have been!

Our assumption is that would have been different in a sense that would have been better, but we simply don’t know that. And without knowing, we cannot really say that what would have happened. We don’t know!

We tend to assume that things would have been better. The truth is that things could have been worse too.

Now take a pen and a piece of paper and make a list of your regrets – big and small. Everything you wanted to achieve in the last 6 months but you didn’t.

……………………….

……………………….

……………………….

Go through them one by one, and spend only 30 seconds for each one. Once you’ve reflected on it, put a line through it and cross it from the list.

Well done!

Now you are set for the Equinox, you are set to allow the 2nd half of the year unfold, beyond regrets, wiser and a lot more prepared.

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Full Moon in Libra – War And Peace

We have a very active Full Moon at 21° Libra on 10/11 April which activates a T-square in Cardinal signs, more exactly Jupiter in Libra, Uranus in Aries, and Pluto in Capricorn. But the central role this time is not played by the Moon, by the Sun, nor by Jupiter, or Uranus, or Pluto…but by Venus, the ruler of this Full Moon, which is now standing still in the sky, close to the Earth, stronger than ever, preparing to turn direct.

It is not completely true that the other planets do not play an important role. We have a T-square, which is a highly dynamic, highly combative combination. Put a T-square in Cardinal signs and you can start a war.

Sun is conjunct Uranus on the Aries side of the  horizon, asking for a revolution of the spirit, on the Libra side we have the Moon conjunct Jupiter, which is interested in beauty and social justice and has little tolerance for what she perceives as the “selfishness” and the “arrogance” of the Sun.

It does not help much Pluto is shooting arrows at both from the top of the cliff, in Capricorn turning everything into a power struggle.

sun-moon-balance

The result? An iron fist in a velvet glove. The spirits will run high, and some sort of conflict is going to be imminent. And even if you will argue “elegantly” (because Libra is so diplomatic, isn’t she) you are still going to run into conflict. A beautiful rose with thorns is a good metaphor for the energy of this Full Moon.

But who are you fighting, really? Who is your opponent?  The essence of the Aries /Libra axis is understanding that the only “enemy” out there is yourself. By first making friends with the “other side” of you —the impulsive, eccentric, stubborn, ego-driven part of you can embrace this beautiful perfect human being that you are.

As we start to understand how this Full Moon energy comes into play, let’s come back to Venus.

The goddess of beauty has now slowed down to the point she cannot slow down anymore. In a few days she will “awaken” and turn direct. But in this deep state of meditation, she is letting herself embraced, (or should we say, stung?) by Chiron, the wounded healer, which is very close to her in Pisces, while both are being exactly squared by Saturn.

This is not an easy transit – Venus has been through a lot lately, has already cracked her heart open at her first meeting with Chiron, and now she is in the middle of the 3-sequence square to Saturn.

This process can be painful and you will be asked to revisit those wounds again and go even deeper into the pain. Saturn will ask you to go as deep as you can, until there is no more place to go. Remember, Saturn draws the limits. You may wonder why Saturn wants so bad to make you suffer.

Saturn does not want to make you suffer. Saturn wants to show you the limits. These limits are the reality. And by acknowledging that everything has a limit, even the pain, you can finally release the fear and start the process of healing.

Venus, now in her evening form in Libra, is here to teach us that beauty is everywhere, in every  laughter, in every sadness, in each single one of us. And that beauty that comes out of conflict, out of struggle is even more potent, because it has embraced both polarities of existence: the “me” and the “we”, the yin and the yang, the feminine and the masculine.

“It was one of those days when it’s a minute away from snowing and there’s this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. Right? And this bag was just dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. That’s the day I realized that there was this entire life behind things, and this incredibly benevolent force that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. (…) Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can’t take it, and my heart is just going to cave in” – Ricky, American Beauty

In Native American tradition the April Full Moon is known as the Pink Moon symbolizing the beauty of nature which awakens at this time of the year. Pink is what is called an “unsaturated” color which means it can only be obtained by mixing different wavelengths. What a beautiful metaphor for what Libra stands for!

If you have planets around 21° in Cardinal signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn) or around 26° Pisces you will be especially affected by this Full Moon.

As all of us have 21° Libra somewhere in our chart, go and check which house the moon is transiting in your chart to see which area of your life will come into focus.

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Mercury in Libra is opposite Uranus in Aries

Our thoughts, ideas and opinions will be a little bit “different”, if not unusual!, and our mind will shine brighter during this transit. Both Mercury and Uranus rule the intellect, with Uranus being the higher octave of Mercury. Uranus transforms the logical processes of Mercury into sudden shifts of awareness. Together, the two will look at mundane things from innovative, highly interesting perspectives.

mercury-libra-opposition-uranus

Image: Michael Cheval – Swing of Love

Speaking our mind, not matter what, will become more important than ever. The Mercury / Uranus aspect is found in the natal charts of Thomas Jefferson, Ben Franklin, James Madison and other epic figures that have set the foundations of what we call now “freedom of speech”.

Mercury in opposition with Uranus will also manifest in some sort of “rebelling” on a mental level. We can get easily distracted and disconnected from activities that bore us, and let our mind instead take off to some more interesting places. And because Mercury is in Libra, these places will tend to be beautiful and have plenty of socializing opportunities.

Things to do during this transit:

  • Question anything that society says is “the way it is”. Or, how Buddha puts it: “Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.” Doubt everything, find your own light 😉
  • Write a blog / conduct a research / communicate about an idea that no one has explored before. Research studies such as “Couples who drink more red wine stay together longer and partners are less likely to develop dementia “ or “How chicken feathers can be used to determine the speed of a tornado” were probably conducted during a Mercury /Uranus transit 😉
  • If single, check some internet dating websites – Mercury is in the sign of partnerships and Uranus can make anything possible 😉

 

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Mercury enters Libra on the 7th of October

Mercury will transit the cardinal Air sign of Libra for about three weeks until October 25th when he moves into Scorpio.

During this transit, we’re more diplomatic and find it easier to see another’s point of view. Libra transits always draw awareness on the areas of our life where balance is needed. Are we too judgmental or on contrary too accommodating?  Are we so stubborn that we cannot accept other people’s viewpoints, or too wishy washy, going back and forth and never seeming to make up our mind? Whatever it is, Mercury in Libra will help us identify the imbalance, and direct us towards those areas we need to adjust in order to create more balance in our life.

7-libra-mercury

Another characteristic of this transit is that our ideas, our communication – in any form – will become more artistic. Music  and painting are beautiful mediums of communication – and Mercury in Libra a has a strong desire for harmony and aesthetics. He loves fine music, poetry,  a good art gallery or performing arts.

Last and not least, Mercury in Libra will sharpen our negotiation skills. If the answer to the question “what is in for me” does not satisfy us, we are more likely than usual to take action (Libra is a Cardinal sign after all) and do something about it: discuss, fight and make up with our spouse, get things straight with our business partner, ask the boss for a promotion. The good news for the spouse, business partner or the boss is that Libra in Mercury will also make us reflect on “what is in for the other”. The magic of negotiation happens when we truly understand our needs, we truly understand the other’s needs, and then we agree on what is the proper ratio of “give and take” to have happy and healthy relationships.